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kaizersultanate's Journal

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The Kaiser/Sultanate Alliance
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Whoever is an enemy to God and His angels and apostles, to Gabriel and Michael,- Lo! God is an enemy to those who reject Faith.



36:67 And if it had been Our Will, We could have transformed them (to remain) in their places; then should they have been unable to move about, nor could they have returned

This is the Forum dedicated to the Kaiser/Sultanate Alliance's Witch Hunt Core. Dedicated to the ridiculing and putting down of those who would ruin the planet with their hibbity jibbity.



Underground Music: Christianity has become it's own worst enemy, the hedonistic tendencies of children to make death metal and Hardcore for Jesus, Jesus likes Jazz you fool. Thats why he is called Jazzes................................ in Rome.. swear to god.

Popular Guitar-Based Music: Punk and New Metal are the more well known genres of Demon Kin Slop Hop. Marilyn Manson dresses up like a woman to shock good hard working folk into thinking he is a demon so that babies will buy his records to use his shock powers for their own. If you are too lazy to shock people yourself then you should be tried and executed as a heretic. Then, your body should be burnt and your ashes tossed into my oatmeal.

Punk is just the misrepresentation of the Anarchist Movement from the early 20th Century that ignited the first World War. Now you're all just a bunch of idiots who wear stupid clothes and brag about drinking lots of Vodka. I will sneak up behind some punks and then toss a golden 20-pound clock at them and scream "DO YOU HAVE THE TIME!?!". When they get pissed and and try and beat me up I will call the cops and have them arrested. Then while they spend the night in jail I will poop and pee all over their cars.


America is drowning in it's own appetite. We grow fat in our endless search for the sweet taste in the mouth. God will surely strike us all down like he did at Sodom and Gomorrah and in Nod. Whoever wrote the My Milkshake Brings the Boys to the Yard song is the enemy of the State.








The Sultan of Sarasota:


The greatest man who has ever lived lives in Sarasota, he brings wisdom and joy to all those who know him, he never burdens anyone. He is fearless in battle and a good leader to his people. He makes so much money, yet he is poor, BECAUSE HE IS A RIVER TO HIS PEOPLE.

The Sultan of Sarasota is Philip Hudson, he is of the Tribe Banu Hanifah. Yet not a direct descendant of the Prophet. He may not have documents to back up this claim, but Faith transcends reason.

He is the Slave of Allah, and does his bidding by persecuting the wicked and arresting those who curse Allah's name. Never has he been driven from the Battlefield in shame, he has never once been defeated. PROOF OF ALLAH'S BLESSING.

In time The Sultan will slay anyone who plays guitar.







The Kaiser is Mighty:
"Kaiser, why do you play the accursed guitar"
"Know thy enemy that you may slay him"

Kaiser, god of the north and of the skies came down from the heavens and
unto the earth he created a city. The city was blessed, it's crops were
bountiful, it's slaves were obedient, and it's wells were never dry.

Many summers passed, and all was well in the Kaiser's city, until a trading
caravan bearing the mark of The 6 Stringed dragon appeared, bringing tales
of an easier way of life, and many gifts and toys.

His first and greatest of gifts was the Distortion. "Look upon this magic
with joy young children. With it, all mistakes are covered. A thing which is
no acievment at all can now be marketed."
He grinned and man now knew the secrets of distortion.

Well the winds blow in all directions and the Kaiser soon learned of the
Dragon's treachery. "Dragon!" he called out, and soon the beast slithered
forward on it's belly. "Dragon, why do you bedevil my children? I teach them
the right way of living, and how to make songs to praise me. I let them see
all of the world, and they know what is good and true. Yet you decieve them,
and soon then cannot see beyond the traps you have laid for them. With your
cultural bonds, mankind now views the entire world as a fashion statement.
He is unable to know that which is not shown to him."

The dragon slithered closer, and lower still to the ground. "Please Kaiser,
I sought only to be like you, to offer man another way of being that he may
be joyous." The Kaiser was silent for a moment, and then he looked to the
dragon. "Dragon, open your ears. What is it that you hear?" The dragon sat
still and he listend. "Grand Kaiser, I hear many songs. I hear feedback and
anguished shrieks. Truly man is making use of his new gifts." "Dragon," The
Kaiser replied, "Before your gifts, the men had no songs of misery. They
sang in sweet tones and praised my name. They knew that they were blessed
and they rejoiced at their wonderous discoveries. Now man has no new
discoveries. He mourns the death of his own creativity but knows not how it
was stolen. He is angry and afraid at the world at and his brothers. His
only songs of happiness are of those in conquest of his wife, but before
you, man knew how to live in harmony with his wife and she never drove him
to madness or solitude. Dragon do you see the wrong you have done to Man?"

The Dragon hissed and drew back. "Kaiser, the fault is your own! Mankind
was unable to experience the bliss of absolute union with his brothers
before my gifts. Now one man is the same as his brother, he knows comfort in
knowing he is at one with all man, and yet I have also let each man believe
he himself to be the greatest among his peers. I have done Man no
disservice, I have done what you yourself could not do!"

Kaiser frowned and his shoulders sank. "Mankind once had the ability to make
his own choices, now the choice has been made for him and he wishes not to
see another way." The Kaiser raised his great hand and smote the treacherous
dragon in an instant. It would have no more opportunities to poison man but
his seed was sown and the Dragon's folly would continue to plague man,
unable to escape. "Man chooses not to let me alleviate his wrongdoing, but
if a man by his own volition ever sees the great misdeeds of his people, I
will give him all of my blessings and he shall raise his people up from
mists of distortion, and back into the light of my favor."


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